How do we help children understand that even familiar people online can have harmful intentions? 

Parenting Perspective 

Teaching children to be cautious of people they know online is a sensitive but crucial conversation. The focus should be on building their skills of discernment and critical thinking, rather than creating mistrust. 

Explain the Difference Between Familiarity and Trust 

Help your child to understand that feeling familiar with someone online is not the same as being able to trust them. You can use a simple comparison, like knowing the local shopkeeper by sight but not sharing private family news with them. This helps to differentiate between casual contact and deep trust. 

Discuss the Concept of Manipulation Gently 

Without using frightening language, you can explain that sometimes people might pretend to be a good friend to get what they want. Give simple examples, such as a gaming friend who suddenly pressures them to keep a secret from their parents. This helps them to recognise unhealthy patterns. 

Teach a ‘Pause and Check’ Habit 

Establish a simple family rule: always pause and check with a parent before sharing personal information or photos online, even with someone they know. Frame this as a normal safety step, like looking both ways before crossing the road, so it feels supportive, not suspicious. 

Reinforce That It’s Not Their Fault 

It is essential to reassure them that if anyone, familiar or not, ever behaves in a harmful way, it is never their fault. Emphasise that the responsibility always lies with the person who acted wrongly. This removes shame and encourages them to speak up. 

By giving children tools to assess trust and boundaries, you help them protect themselves from harm without losing the ability to connect positively online. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam guides us to be discerning in our relationships and wise in who we place our trust in. This applies to both our online and offline interactions. 

Not Every Familiar Face is a Safe One 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 9: 

‘They [think to] deceive Allah and those who have believed, but they do not deceive except themselves, and they perceive [it] not…’ 

This reminds us that some people may appear genuine while hiding harmful intentions, and that true wisdom lies in being cautious without becoming mistrustful of everyone. 

Choosing Companions with Care 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 5779, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The example of a good companion and a bad companion is that of the bearer of musk and the one who pumps the bellows. From the bearer of musk, you will either buy it or find its good smell. And from the one who pumps the bellows, you will either get your clothes burnt or find a bad smell.’ 

This teaches us that the company we keep, whether online or offline, has a direct effect on our safety, behaviour, and values. 

When children understand that Islam encourages them to be thoughtful in choosing companions, they learn that boundaries with familiar people online are not about suspicion but about protecting their dignity, safety, and faith.