Supporting a Teen Who Uses Their Phone to Escape Sadness 

Parenting Perspective 

When a teenager consistently retreats to their room with a phone as a response to sadness or stress, it is a clear sign they are using the screen as an escape. It is natural for parents to feel shut out or rejected, but reacting with anger will only widen the distance. The goal is to gently reconnect and help them develop healthier ways to process difficult emotions. 

Approach with Gentle Curiosity 

Resist the urge to demand entry or answers. Instead, wait for a calm moment to extend an invitation for connection. You could say, ‘I have noticed you have been spending more time alone lately. I just want you to know I am here if you ever want to talk, or even if you just want some quiet company’. This approach offers presence without pressure, which is key. 

Create Safe Emotional Outlets 

Gently encourage other outlets for processing difficult emotions. For some teens, this might be conversation, but for others, it could be journaling, exercising, or engaging in a creative hobby. The aim is to show them that their feelings are valid and that there are constructive ways to work through them, rather than simply numbing them with a screen. 

Balance Privacy with Connection 

It is essential to respect their need for privacy while maintaining a thread of connection. Simple acts like knocking before entering their room show respect. Meanwhile, regular, low-pressure check-ins and occasionally sharing your own minor struggles can normalise conversation and help them feel both safe in their space and seen by you. 

Guide Healthier Digital Use 

Instead of demonising the phone, help them see it as a tool that can be used in healthier ways. Suggest they explore apps for Quranic recitation, guided breathing exercises, or mindfulness. This, combined with gentle boundaries on overall screen time, helps them build a toolkit of coping strategies where the phone is not their only option. 

Through a consistent approach of empathy, respect, and gentle structure, parents can help their teenager learn a crucial lesson: difficult emotions do not need to be escaped, but can be navigated and healed with loving, real-world support. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam offers the ultimate source of comfort in times of distress: turning to Allah. Guiding a teenager to see their emotional struggles as an opportunity for remembrance (dhikr) can redirect their heart from seeking temporary escape to finding true, lasting peace. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Ar Rad (13), Verse 28: 

‘Surely in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find peace…’ 

This powerful verse provides a clear path to inner calm. It teaches that while distractions offer a fleeting numbness, true tranquillity for the heart is found only in the remembrance of its Creator. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 5642, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘There is no fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah expiates some of his sins for that.’ 

This beautiful hadith reframes the experience of hardship. It teaches us that moments of sadness and stress are not meaningless; when faced with patience, they become a means by which Allah purifies a believer, turning pain into a source of reward. 

By sharing this profound spiritual perspective, you empower your teen to see their struggles differently. They are not weaknesses to be hidden, but opportunities to turn to Allah and grow in faith. Gradually, they can learn that the safest refuge is found not in a phone screen, but in the embrace of faith and family.