What should I do when my children keep fighting no matter how many times I step in? 

Parenting Perspective 

Persistent sibling fighting is frequently an indication that your children are learning how to share attention, space, and power rather than a sign of failure. Rather than simply stopping the behaviour, step back and look deeper: What skills are missing here? Emotional control, empathy, and conflict resolution are not innate. You are the main instructor, and they are taught gradually. Guide from the side rather than stepping in right away. Say: I hear both of you. Before we resolve this, let us take a moment to relax. Or: I want you to try to explain what you need and how you feel, but I will stay close. Helping your children identify their needs and feelings rather than taking sides teaches them how to speak peace rather than just remain silent. Your job is to use conflict as a teaching tool for empathy, decency, and accountability, not to eradicate it. 

Spiritual Insight 

Conflicts between siblings are not new. Even prophets’ sons experienced rivalry and jealousy. However, Islam provides a better way, one that is based on kindness and reconciliation. Allah Almighty says in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 10: 

“Indeed, the believers are brothers (to each other); so, make peace with your brothers; and seek piety from Allah (Almighty) so that you may receive His Mercy.” 

This verse applies to more than only tribal or political conflicts. The smallest unit, the home, is where it starts. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ corrected disputes with mercy and wisdom. In Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 2692, he said: 

“He who makes peace between the people by inventing good information or saying good things, is not a liar.” 

This Hadith gives parents the permission to soften the tension, spotlight the good in each child, and even reframe the situation to build a connection. Saying, Your brother was trying to play with you, not hurt you, is not dishonest. It is intentional Tarbiyyah. It plants mercy where there was friction. Peace-making in parenting is not about suppressing conflict; it is about elevating the hearts involved. When you guide your children toward reconciliation, you are not only teaching them life skills. You are performing a prophetic act.